


I'm alive with you (And it feels so true)

by plikki



Series: And in my dreams I've kissed your lips a thousand times [17]
Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Kissing, Technically Ladrien
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-09
Updated: 2020-04-09
Packaged: 2021-03-02 05:48:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,347
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23560108
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/plikki/pseuds/plikki
Summary: Kissing prompt:An unexpected kiss that shocks the one receiving it
Relationships: Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug
Series: And in my dreams I've kissed your lips a thousand times [17]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1598920
Comments: 14
Kudos: 92





	I'm alive with you (And it feels so true)

**Author's Note:**

> This was Caly's request. Since it was not posted from an account, I can't make this a gift, but I hope they see it!
> 
> I've been thinking about writing this prompt for some time but I couldn't work out which side of the love square to use for it. When I sit down to write it, I decided it would work best with Ladrien, but didn't want it to be ordinary Ladrien and well... this happened.   
> (Title from ATB feat. Heather Nova - Renegade)

It didn’t take long for Adrien to realise why he’d been so reluctant to do this. At first, it hadn’t seemed like such a bad idea. Ladybug wanted his help, he couldn’t leave her hanging. But he clearly remembered what had happened the previous time. She might think she needed Aspik, but she didn’t know that this meant she’d have to do this without Chat Noir. 

He had tried to do some quick thinking on the spot. Her plan didn’t exactly need Chat. But she needed the snake Miraculous and as luck would have it, Luka could not be found. So logically her next choice was Adrien since he had experience. So he’d decided to give it a go. He’d told her he’d go find Adrien and send him her way. 

His first time as Aspik had left him close to a breakdown. He had tried for too long, overtaxing the kwami and himself, both mentally and physically. And after that… he couldn’t shake off the nightmares for weeks. It was something he didn’t want repeated. But the temptation to help her, to answer her call was too strong. And he really hoped it would be different this time. He needed it to be, for his own sanity. 

After he found her again as Adrien and got the Miraculous from her, he was once again amazed by the instant change in her demeanor. Gone was the confident and bossy Ladybug he knew so well. Of course she had her moments, when she lost her footing or presence of mind, she was only human. But he was pretty sure that in all their time as partners he’d never seen her act the way she acted around Aspik as Chat. 

She was kind of bubbly, which was not a bad look on her but not something he was used to. And while he tried hard to ignore the way she was looking at him, it was unmistakably there. He didn’t want to dwell on it, because it was confusing and definitely not good for his concentration. But he couldn’t fully ignore it too. 

Luckily he didn’t have too much time to think about that. They put her plan into action. But then he quickly realised he’d done the wrong thing again. Instead of considering the way she acted around Aspik, he should have spent whatever precious time he had to mentally prepare for what was ahead. He’d known it wouldn’t be easy, especially since the chances of them getting it right on the first attempt were too slim. But he should have prepared better.

Because he found out too soon that he wasn’t ready. Seeing his lady get hit, dissolve into nothing, die. It was a nightmare come to life and even knowing that he had the power to change this, to rewind time and have her back with him didn’t help him much. 

This was how he found himself trembling and barely coherent after using his first Second Chance. Ladybug was looking at him confused, not knowing what had happened. Of course she didn’t. He held up a finger, asking for a moment, while trying to bring his breathing under control. This was not the time for this reaction. He’d freak out and mourn her after that, when there was no danger any more. When he didn’t have to act quickly to help her. He tried to convince himself that, but it was so hard. 

“Adrien, what’s wrong, what happened?” Came Ladybug’s worried voice. Gone were the warm smile and cheerfulness she’d greeted him with. 

“I’m sorry,” he managed to get out. “I thought I could do this. I thought I was prepared, knowing what to expect and all. But it was still too much.” He tried to explain his own jumbled thoughts. “Seeing you disappear, feeling your loss. It brought back the memories from last time, the hopelessness and desperation after each failed attempt. And the worst of all, the sinking feeling that I might get it wrong, miss the chance and never bring you back,” he whispered the last part, his voice cracking. He’d never admitted this fear out loud, but it was so real. And impossible to ignore now.

“Hey, I’m here. You did it,” she rushed to reassure him. But it was not enough. The memory in his mind was too fresh, too clear. 

“I can’t bear losing you, my…” he stopped, somehow managing to swallow “lady” before it was too late and hoping he could still cover the slip up. “Ladybug,” he continued. But then it was no longer the slip-up that worried him, but the way she would take this admission. It was too much to say this as Adrien, for sure. He looked away, ashamed. Obviously, he couldn’t get anything right. 

“Adrien,” he heard her say, the gentle tone of her voice surprising him and making him look back at her. “I don’t know why you care so much about me,” she continued, confusion clear in her voice. 

He didn’t know how to answer that without giving too much away. He’d already said more than he should have. So he just looked at her, feeling helpless. But then she surprised him by continuing.

“But then again, I care so much about you too and I can’t explain it to you, but you should know it.” As she said this, her eyes spoke of honesty and vulnerability that she’d chosen.

He gasped, completely taken aback by her words. But what shocked him more was what she did next. Because even her confession hadn’t prepared him for this. He didn’t know when she moved, maybe it was because of his reaction to her words, but suddenly she was kissing him. A part of him was frozen, absolutely unprepared for this. But another one, the same part that had been waiting for this moment from the first time he met her, didn’t hesitate. The girl he loved was kissing him. It was a dream come true. He would be a fool to just stand there and do nothing. 

So he kissed her back, capturing her soft lips before she could pull back. His arms wrapped around her and he felt the tentative touch of her hands on his shoulders. He kissed her with all he had, all the love he’d kept inside of him. And suddenly the worries and bad memories that had brought them there were swept away by the happiness that surged inside his heart. 

When they finally broke apart, he lifted a hand to caress her flushed cheek. But before he could say how much this meant to him, he caught sight of the Miraculous on his wrist. It was precariously close to its limit, their time was running out. 

“I have only a few seconds before I can use my Second Chance,” he whispered. He knew she’d understand. 

“You will remember this no matter what you do,” she replied, but that fact didn’t seem to trouble her too much. 

“I don’t want to forget it anyway,” he said, just to be certain that she knew. 

“And neither do I,” she shot back with no hesitation, which surprised him. Seeing her let her emotions lead her was so unexpected. And then it happened. He detransformed, leaving a confused Sass behind. 

Adrien let go of Ladybug, suddenly embarrassed. They had a job to do and there they were instead. What would the wise kwami think? 

“You’re not done yet,” Sass stated, but there was no judgement in his voice. 

“Yes, sorry, we got carried away,” Ladybug said, the soft blush on her cheeks turning darker as he felt his own cheeks burn up. “You need to recharge and we’ll head back.”

She looked at Adrien, smiling shyly. They’d have to talk later. And it would be about much more than she expected, he thought with a smile. But what had happened had taught him one thing. Life was too short to wait. He wanted to tell her everything and hoped that what she’d told him, what happened, would help her accept it. 

**Author's Note:**

> I didn't expect this to turn out so angsty. But I just spent a week in hospital with my son so I guess I had some anxiety to vent.


End file.
